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Solving can seem tough. Coming up with that kind of conversation in the moment can be extremely difficult... Guys, does this sound familiar: (that you just met that you've known for a while),...But you're having trouble coming up with anything to say to her, besides overdone topics like your jobs, the weather, upcoming holidays, etc...
you want an interesting, flirty, fun conversation that actually lets you get to know her better, right? You want a conversation that takes that first step towards how to get a girlfriend. You want to know how to talk to girls, but you just can't seem to manage it. With these steps, .
It all comes down to the process....And these steps/tips work wherever you want to keep a conversation going (online, on dating apps/sites, in-person, over text, etc.). How to Keep a Conversation Going with a Girl (7 Simple Steps) While there are plenty of articles out there that try to complicate the process of how to keep a conversation going with a girl,.
If you follow these steps, you'll be every time a chatting opportunity arises. Look, there's a lot of advice out there, but . Whatever you are going to talk about, with whomever, and for however long, as you've got. in a conversation, and if you can pull off a good beginning it's smoother sailing going forward.
If you're stressing this one, don't be. Just have a few things to talk about with a girl handy so you can transition between topics without having to come up with anything on the spot. Just choose from the options below to stay relaxed while you're chatting. Listen.... The hard way is by improv, just coming up with it as you go.
Settle upon a few intriguing topics before you even start talking, and then drop them in to keep the conversation going. Ideally, you should , allowing her to give her opinions and letting you know more about her. Ask her how she deals with her stress if you're both going through examine season.
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Or, just good and the bad. Most of the help on the internet for ‘how to keep a conversation going with a girl’ advises you to ask a lot of questions.… (girls do love interesting questions), . What’re the right type? You want to make sure that you have questions to ask a girl to get to know her.
she tells you “I’m a writer for a magazine.” Instead of saying “Cool!”, “How’d you get that job?” or “How long have you done that?” (all bland, highly expected questions), “That sounds fun! Do you write about topics that interest you?” (interest)“What made you start writing?” (past)“Do you like the magazine? Do you think you’ll keep writing for them?” (desires)See how those questions are more interesting/tell you a lot more about her than purely surface-level questions? Not only do those right type of questions tell you more, but they also keep her more interested in the conversation, In short...
Guys... you should only who’s interested in you,Dragging on a conversation with that girl... the girl who doesn’t look at you, ask questions about you, or give you her full attention (she looks around the room or at her phone) will not only waste your time, but will make you feel defeated and rejected.
Check here to learn the signs that she does like you, and does want to keep talking to you. While you're interviewing this girl, you have to remember it's still a between two people, and don’t treat it like a real interview (firing questions at her without giving any information about ...
I need a vacation.” She wants to complain about her job for a minute. Ask her about that.“I really need to clean out my phone's photos. I have way too many.” She wants to talk about her pictures. Ask her what she loves photographing so much.“I have a super busy weekend.” She wants to talk about what she’s doing.
because you’re not only showing her that you hear her, but that you care about the deeper meaning behind what she’s saying. And a man who cares like that is what girls want. She tells you exactly how to keep a conversation going with her. Ask her real, interesting questions about her statements, and show her you’re really trying to understand who she is.
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I was insanely attracted to my boyfriend when we met, simply because he expressed all of his interesting thoughts. Some of them were goofy, but it made me feel 1000x more comfortable, and willing to show him my real thoughts, too. Reporters actually use this as a technique all the time… they continue to hold their microphone up, or continue to gaze at the person they’re interviewing, and the person will almost always keep talking, spilling more and more information.
Wait for her to do it (women almost always will). Now… if she doesn’t immediately start talking, don’t feel like it's your responsibility to do it... just let there be a powerful moment of silence. Scan the room (and maybe discover something to talk about). Check out her body language (see if she seems physically interested).
Smiling while welcoming a comfortable, silent moment between you makes it seem like you’re old friends, not uncomfortable strangers. Panicking when there’s a silence makes for an awkward conversation, and makes you lose focus on those conversational leads. Welcome the silent moments, and make them work to your advantage. It all seems when you're trying to keep a conversation going with a random girl you aren't particularly romantically interested in.
figuring out how to talk to a girl you like is not really much different than figuring out how to keep a conversation going with a girl, any girl. So, use the steps above as a guide, and then get that little bit further. There are two ways most guys mess up a conversation with a girl they like: .
Be engaged, try to be a bit flirty, but don't be too forward. You want to signal that you like her and that you want to get closer, but you don't want to sound demanding or desperate. keep the conversation low-key and let it evolve naturally. It's easy to say "keep it casual but stay engaged,"You don't need to stress so much over how to keep a conversation going with a girl you like, really.
Use basic every-day topics to get a conversation going., so coming up and just asking her what she thinks about a class, a recent meeting, or some other shared experience is a great way to show her you're an easy-going guy who's easy to talk to. Throw in a joke if you have one, or use some of your conversation starters from the section above.
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Girls like plenty of different kinds of guys, but one thing that will stand out and make most girls look more closely at you is Girls love sweet guys, and the best way to prove you're a sweet guy is to have sweet things to say to a girl. There's a whole world of options to go for here, and .
Or, tell her simply that you're really together, and that you've been looking forward to this moment. offer up your time if she wants it. Tell her you'd be happy to help her with homework or to listen to her problems any time. That way, you show her you're reliable, interested, and sweet all at once.
If she doesn't want to talk about her problems, . A sweet guy knows when to back off and find a different way to show how he's feeling. Girls love compliments. Most guys don't need to be told that. After all, it’s nice to hear something nice, and it’s even better from a man they really like...
It just seems insincere, because she knows she's not amazing, and it comes off as desperate to drop compliments left and right. That's where the trouble arises. Guys know compliments for girls are a great thing to have on hand when talk to a girl they like, but some just don't know how to compliment a girl.
I can’t believe what a good time I’ve had here. These are sincere, serious compliments that you don’t want to say randomly. Wait for the right moment, when she seems really interested, and you’re about to end the conversation (see below for how and why you do that). Walking away from a great conversation is incredibly hard, it also practically guarantees that you’ll be talking again soon.
Do you want her to think that about your conversation? Of course not, right? So even if it’s hard, let the conversation end naturally, and save something for next time. When we're talking about how to keep a conversation going with a girl, when it comes to text. In person, you can see if a girl is interested in your conversation and she basically has to give you some response, but by text the ways how to text a girl to get her to respond and stay interested aren't any more complicated than talking in person.
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If not, . There's no reason to strain about this, though.. Work with events she might like, news about mutual friends, or interesting topics you know she'll want to talk about. If you don't have any of that, just to get things started. Once you have a reason, find a great way to .
You can ask her about the best book she's ever read or if she'd rather be a meatball or a slice of salami. Whatever you think , try that. if you can connect it to the reason you're texting, all the better. Once you've got a conversation going by text, you run into the same problems that came up at the beginning of this article: how to keep a conversation going with a girl.
The best answer is to just . As was discussed at length above, there's nothing that like asking questions. Before you text a word, develop a list of questions to ask a girl over text that are sure to . You can ask her something as simple as her opinion about a movie you know she saw recently or go deeper to find out who she's closest to in her family.
When you finish talking through one question, . Or go to Option 6 or 7. If the timing is right, move your conversation on to a focus about the morning by sending a good morning text for her. You can ask her about what she , her plans for the day, or find out what her favorite thing to do is right when she wakes up.
If you're heading toward the , turn the topic to a good night text for her. Talk to her about her plans for the next day, or just make it by saying you messaged just to wish her sweet dreams. Just like in any conversation, you have to know when to walk away.
You can do this by either (time for bed, class is starting, got to meet a friend, etc.) or just and end it there. Whatever you do, try to , so she knows you want to keep this habit going. I know, nothing is more terrifying to some guys than trying to talk to a girl when there are tons of people around..it really isn't any harder to learn how to talk to girls at parties than it is to learn how to keep a conversation going with a girl when you're alone with her.
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In a way, it frees you. Sure, this girl is probably beautiful... but does that mean that she’s funny? Or smart? Or interesting? She may actually be the opposite of all those things. Even if you've known her for a while, you may still assume that she's exactly what you want...
Either way, don't be intimidated by her 'perfectness'... Don't blindly assume she’s perfect, but do try to uncover the real her (almost like a reporter). Remind yourself that there’s no need to feel nervous… you’re not trying to impress this girl, you’re figuring out if the real her is worth your time.
To get the whole process, Find out to know if you're on the right track. Take that big step by figuring out . If you know , you'll have far more romantic options going forward. Knowing how to keep a conversation going with a girl is perhaps not quite as easy as just shouting "will you be my girlfriend," but it is .
Besides, following these steps makes the whole process so . You'll be able to stop stressing about how to keep a conversation going with a girl and You'll be having with all the girls you want to chat within no time....And if you use my advice, you'll have those conversations and feel more confident, less nervous, and seem 1000x more attractive.
For example, if you met her at a coffee shop, you could say something like, “Wow, this place has so many options. Do you have a favorite drink here?” Asking open-ended questions is another great way to get her talking and keep the conversation fresh. Go for questions that are meaningful and need more than a “yes” or “no” answer.
If you have your phone on you, put it away so you can give her your full attention. Also, don’t be afraid of the occasional silence. It’s totally natural to pause now and then when you’re talking to someone. Just smile and take a moment to think about what you want to say next, or give her a chance to take the initiative.
Let her know how much you enjoyed chatting with her, and that you’d love to talk again sometime. If she seems interested, you can even offer to give her your phone number—or ask her for hers. For tips on how to have open body language or end the conversation, keep reading! .
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You may sometimes experience awkward silences when you are with your crush or girlfriend, and that is when you should try to figure out how to keep a conversation going with a girl. However, before you delve into knowing how to keep talking with her, understand that it is okay to have silent moments.
You should also remember that not talking does not mean not being interested. However, awkward silences may make you anxious if you are in a new romantic relationship or trying to win a girl’s heart. So, when you are with a girl, make sure to come up with some interesting topics to keep the conversation fun.
If you’re talking to a girl you’re interested in, your first (or first few) conversations will form her first opinion of you, and first opinions are often long-lasting. Keep these tips in mind for a smooth flow of words. Even the most stimulating conversation goes through ups and downs. The key is to recognize these moments and patterns and speak accordingly.
Sometimes, a slight pause in the conversation means that you are considering what you just discussed and processing it. Point to consider To prevent the conversation from feeling forced, validate the girl’s feelings, thoughts, or experiences. It encourages her to keep up the conversation with you. These subjects can alter the mood and flow of the conversation, and as a rule, you should avoid them with someone you’re not close to.
One of the most common pitfalls in any conversation occurs when discussing something generic like the weather or how your day at work was. While these are perfectly normal things to talk about or discuss, they should come up organically and not as a conversation starter. It might generate a few lines of back and forth communication, but you’ll find the conversation slowly fizzling out.
Try to break the ice a bit by being playful and asking questions they may not expect.. It can also make you appear more fun. No conversation should feel like an interrogation. If you ask closed questions like “How are you?” the possibilities for them to respond in more than a word or sentence diminish.
A big part of what makes something funny is the right timing. When you see an opening for a joke or a witty observation, go for it. You may also come off as funny and charming. Point to consider Think about some amusing things that happened to you or share a hilarious pet story.
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Flirting is a great way to add some vibrancy to the conversation as it stimulates a whole different side of them. Say things like “You look like a prankster who plays pranks from time to time” or “You don’t seem like the type who follows the rules” based on the equation and comfort level you share with the person you’re talking to.
Quick tip If you don’t feel ready to ask out the girl to hang out one-on-one, propose to hang out in a group. We all lead busy lives, and having our schedules align is rare for most working people. That said, you can always find time (or rather, make time) to have a conversation.
A common mistake people make when they’re nervous, especially on dates, is jumping from one topic to another in a conversation. For example, you might start with workplace issues and suddenly change it to the weather. Instead of running through topics, participate in whatever comes up and see each conversation to its organic end before switching to a new topic.
It could be due to mood or other circumstances outside of your control. Keep some light-hearted and casual topics handy, so your interactions never go dull. Ensure these topics fit every occasion and can be used regardless of the time or mood. Do not pick controversial topics that include religion or politics.
Make an effort to know her interests and actively engage with her. It may lead to an interesting conversation, and she will appreciate the fact that you went out of your way to find out things about her. People in general love to talk about things they are passionate about.
For example, your passion for golf might not interest her. And if you ramble about it, she might get bored. You can, however, bring up your interests if asked. There are few feelings as gratifying as finding someone with shared interests and being able to talk about these things passionately.
However, it could become monotonous after a while. That’s when you should taper off and change the subject. It’s perfectly normal to disagree on some subjects. The key to handle the disagreement is changing the topic or letting it go without debating for or against it. If you end up disagreeing on something, ensure you voice your points in an honest, polite, and respectful manner.
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It might not be easy to open up to someone and list your fears, flaws, or insecurities. But if you like her and open up, it shows that you are comfortable confiding in her. For better or worse, you are laying your soul bare and bonding. If you are lucky, she will feel encouraged to do the same with you.
I wonder if I offended her in a previous life. Do you believe in resurrection?” Accept that as we get to know someone, our list of “interesting” topics would end. What matters is that you’re authentic about these things and go on smoothly. Ensure you’re listening more than you’re talking and connecting with her.
You may have an amazing conversation one day when you discuss a movie or book that you both love and then have a series of mundane discussions about work and traffic. You should know how to rekindle the spark you felt at the peak of your conversations and how to get things back on track.
Put a fresh spin by asking her about the restaurants she likes and if they serve the same cuisine or if she considers changing her job. Mention a new movie being made based on her favorite book, or talk about a favorite comedian coming up with a new show in town.
One of the most engaging activities we partake in as social creatures is gossiping. It doesn’t need to have a negative connotation. Studies have shown that gossip can be good for us as long as we don’t steer it into something obsessive or toxic (1). Gossip can be a good way to vent, and studies show we usually gossip with people we trust.
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Don’t sweat it. Knowing how to keep a conversation going with a girl can be hard, but by following the above tips, reminding yourself to be confident (and allowing yourself to simply be yourself), you will be great in no time.
The best questions to ask and topics to talk about. How to do it via text, online, and on the phone. Are you ready to talk yourself in her heart and her body? Then let’s get started… Quick Navigation I couldn’t do it. I still remember my first interactions with women.
I was clueless and hopeless. Every time I approached a girl it ended the same way… My first interaction lasted twenty seconds. Then she ran away. The second one lasted one minute. Then she excused herself. The third one wasn’t better. No number, no date, nothing. That’s why I began to read scientific studies about effective conversations and the language differences of men and women.
This allowed me to discover these three core principles… Can I tell you something? Seriousness is your biggest enemy. Yes, you should be engaging. But just because politics, the news, and animal rights are engaging, doesn’t mean that you should talk about these topics. This allows her to relax. This makes her like you more.
Ask and you shall receive. Choosing the right topics is important, but questions are the key to keeping a conversation going with a girl. A lot of guys are good at asking questions…but they ask the wrong questions. Where do you live? What do you do for a living? What do you like to do after work? Asking the right questions is the foundation for an engaging conversation.
The right questions fulfill three main purposes:They trigger emotions. They keep the conversation going. They make her laugh and feel good. And don’t forget my famous “have you ever wondered” question… Here’s what I mean by REALLY deep:Don’t just scratch the surface! Okay, here are some examples: Don’t just ask her about her studies.
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Don’t just ask her about her family. Ask her about her relationship with her parents. Don’t just ask her about her friends. Ask her to share her most memorable experiences with them. Dig deep! Funny questions keep a conversation going. This is a universal rule. They might not be perfect to build an emotional connection, but they work.
And let’s face it. If you’re smiling and laughing, you don’t want to end the interaction. Here are some questions I love to ask girls:"What was your favorite Disney movie when you were a child?""Have you ever talked to animals or to stones?""What would your superhero name be?"Ask her a funny question and she’ll stick around.
I love this type of question. The “have you ever wondered” question can lead in many directions. It can be a funny question that makes her laugh. But it can also be a deep question that makes her think. Here are some questions I like to ask girls:"Have you ever wondered why people are not honest to themselves?""Have you ever wondered why birds fly and penguins don’t?""Have you ever wondered why sex feels good?" " question."And yes, I really asked the last question.
Always act! Never react! Well, that’s not entirely true. Reactive questions are extremely good to keep a conversation going with a girl. But that’s not all. They are also the easiest type of questions because, well, you just have to react. She talks about traveling. You ask her about traveling.
You ask her about her family. She talks about…you get the point. No matter what she says, you use the information she gives you and turn it into a question. It’s really that simple. Questions are awesome. But let’s face it. You can’t ask her question after question. You don’t want to turn this into an interrogation.
Keep in mind that there are good topics and bad topics:Don’t talk about politics. Be careful about religion. Avoid disasters and crisis. Here are some good topics that keep a conversation going… Remember what I said earlier. Talk about what she likes and the conversation will flow. That’s why you have to find out what she likes.
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However, if you don’t know how to keep a conversation going, how are you supposed to get to know one another? We understand that speaking to someone you don’t know well is hard. However, there are certain things in life you just have to try and get over. By doing your homework and by learning how to keep a conversation going with a girl, you’ll be able to sidestep this issue in your love life.
It has to be done! It’s the single best way for both sides to learn more, and it’s something to fall back on in an established relationship when things become tough. If you can’t have a conversation now, what makes you think you’re going to be able to later in the relationship? [Read: Drawing a blank? Try these 25 good conversation starters] Before engaging in conversation with a girl, it’s good to have a list of potential conversation topics to talk about! Education Career Plans Hobbies Passions Favorite music Travel Movies Childhood Family and friends Pets Entertainment Current events Although some of these can spark great conversations about her personal life, make sure you do not be too personal or make her feel pressured to talk about certain topics.
There are actually a lot of different reasons that cause awkwardness. Luckily, many of those reasons have to do with a lack of preparation. If you really like a girl, then your best chance at making her yours is to be a great conversationalist. No one will want to stay away from someone that they love talking to.
If you show up for a date or enter into a conversation not having anything to talk about, you’re going to fall flat. You have to be prepared for all different types of conversations if you want to keep a conversation going with a girl. Not only do you have to be prepared for topics, but you have to be in a mindset that is prepared to be calm and collected.
Relax, stay casual, and then you’ll be able to hold a proper conversation. [Read: 20 little ways to perfect your first conversation with a girl you like] When getting to know someone, you should try to engage their interest and learn about the things they like, as opposed to the things they do.
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This brings up stress from work and can cause a person’s mood to shift. If you ask them what they like to do, you’ll get them talking about their passions and they’ll not only have a lot to say about it, they’ll be in a much better mood. [Read: How to make a girl laugh, smile, and like you instantly] Too many guys make the mistake of switching topics just when a girl starts getting excited about one.
They want to make sure they have something else to talk about. However, that actually creates the opposite effect than what people intend to do. She’ll just be bummed that you skipped over that topic and you’ll run out of things to say. When a girl seems to be liking the topic you’re discussing, don’t stop talking about it until she ends it.
Don’t make it seem like an interview, but don’t listen to what her favorite band is and then move on. Ask her why it’s her favorite, If she’s ever seen them in concert, etcetera. Asking questions not only allows you to get to know her better, but also allows new topics to arise during the conversation.
[Read: 20 funny questions to ask a girl and leave her ROFL] Your energy should match the energy of the girl you’re talking to. If she is enthusiastic about an interest or hobby of hers, show enthusiasm with her. If there is something about the topic that has upset her, be upset for her *and try to change the topic*.
Remember to be yourself and you should stay on the right side of the line. You don’t have to just stick to what you know. If she’s talking about something that you know a friend had a really funny story about, go ahead and share it. Pulling from someone else’s experiences gives you more material to cover.
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Then, she’ll be able to get to know you better as well. [Read: 20 intellectual conversation topics that ignite meaningful communication] We know it’s hard not to interject when you think of something that relates to what she’s talking about. This is especially hard if you don’t want to forget it.
Try to hold onto those thoughts until she’s done with what she’s talking about and then bring them up. It’ll keep the conversation flowing smoothly. Also, she won’t feel like you’re trying to shut her up by cutting her off. [Read: The complete guide to keep a conversation going smoothly with the opposite sex] You should definitely be asking a lot of questions, but make sure they’re open-ended.
Asking open-ended questions or asking her to elaborate on something allows her to open up and talk more. This will make the conversation seamless. If she seems to be bored or struggling to talk about a topic, know how to transition from it to another naturally. What we’re saying is, don’t randomly bring up a topic that has no relevance to the conversation.
Now, you don’t have to keep a list out during a dinner date and cross certain things off *that may actually be creepy* but you should have a mental checklist. Talk about her hobbies, pets, family, job, and even something about her college life. Knowing what to talk about next will save you when it seems like the conversation is taking a downhill turn.
Subjects about her friends are family are usually safe, but do not pressure her to delve into her life with her ex, for example. Doing so is a surefire way to make any girl feel uncomfortable. We will be the first to admit that gossiping can be fun. It is engaging and can be a great way to vent if you need to.
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But the key is: keep it non-toxic. Check to see if she is still interested in the conversation topic, or if it’s time to switch things up. She may give you a response, but not want to continue the conversation at hand. And that’s okay! If she doesn’t straight up tell you that she doesn’t want to keep talking about the topic at hand, there are other ways you can tell.
If she looks displeased, you should consider changing the conversation topic. If her body is positioned away from you, or she looks closed off and reserved, she isn’t feeling it. Be sure to keep an eye out on her body language to tell if she wants to continue the conversation or not.
The best thing you can do is to just acknowledge the silence and bring some humor to the moment. Better yet, talk about how you love or hate awkward moments because they’re so funny. You can even bring up a previous funny story about an awkward moment and use that to ease your way out of the silence.
Don’t be afraid to be a bit playful and be sure to keep it organic and light. Find ways to tease her without making fun of her interests. For flirting tips, we have a guide with 54 secrets and 41 examples of how to flirt with a girl and make her blush.
Sometimes it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Just remember that you can try all the tricks in the book, but if the other person isn’t putting in the effort, then it’s not going to be a successful conversation. As long as you try your best to keep the conversation going with a girl, that’s all that matters.
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But you should know when you should debate with her, and when you should let it go. The key is to remember this is a playful and lighthearted setting. If there is a serious topic you disagree with, let it go. Instead of debating, change the topic so neither you nor her become uncomfortable or defensive.
Don’t worry if you end up saying something that in hindsight seems a little weird. That’s probably a real conversation starter and something that will keep the chat going. Before you decide to end the conversation completely, don’t be afraid to sneak in a line about chatting again soon. Remember to keep it casual and lighthearted.
Whatever her interests may be, use that as a reason to see her next. [Read: How to ask for a second date and not fumble or appear too eager] As we stated earlier, asking a girl questions about herself is the best way to keep a conversation alive. You will be able to learn about her and always have something new to discuss.
Keep in mind that the girl you’re talking to is only human, just like you. There may be moments in the conversation that fall flat or even silent because one or both of you are nervous or can’t think of anything to say. This is perfectly normal! Just be sure that you can efficiently start a new conversation topic that flows naturally.
And she may have an answer to a question you aren’t fond of. Either way, just remember to not put pressure on her to be perfect because she is not. When we want to make a good first impression, or when we are nervous, we tend to put on our best front to please whoever sits in front of us.
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Starting a conversation with that cute girl could seem so scary. But it doesn't have to be. Here are 5 simple steps to get her attention. So you've set up an online dating profile. You've been browsing around. You see some girls you like. Now it's time to talk to them.
However, if you do decide to take the leap, you never know where it could go. In a worst-case scenario, she won't reply and you may feel a bit disappointed. But you'll get over it. In a best-case scenario, you may meet someone really cool. So how do you go about starting a conversation that may actually lead somewhere? Here are some good tips.
For one, you can make your profile so compelling that girls will be making the first move to talk to you (but don't lie either, which we'll get into next!). But on a more serious note, here are some major advantages of meeting online. Online profiles already tell you about a girl's interests.
You already know the girl is single and (hopefully) the profile also says what kind of relationship she's looking to find. You have time to craft a unique opener. And chatting online gives you time to type interesting responses. If you say something dumb, the embarrassment isn't as much as chatting in person.
If it leads to a date, you already know you have a lot in common. The first thing to do is to have the strongest profile possible. It doesn't matter how compelling your message might be, the first thing she'll want to see are your pictures, interests, who you are, and what you're looking for in a relationship.
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"I like women who are intelligent, creative, and spontaneous. You enjoy a night out sampling tapas just as much as a night in watching movies with wine. Bonus points if you love pit bulls." Don't say that you're funny and smart. Say things that are funny and smart that show who you are.
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Are you sure you didn't steal my profile?" If you don't have any common interests (but still like her), ask a question unique to her expertise or interest, whether the question is serious or not. "I saw that you're a dog lover and was curious if you think poodles are smarter than pugs.
"I am the Knight they call Nee." If you can't think of anything to say, own it. Just say, "Sorry, this is really awkward. I wanted to get to know you but I couldn't think of something clever to say, so can we just pretend that I did and go from there?" Write with correct grammar and spelling.
In other words, no net-speak! U shud nvr write like this lol... aight? Tip: OKCupid has found that short messages at around 200 characters (around 40 words) get the best response rate. Remember, the goal of the first message is to start a conversation with her. That's it. You don't have to write your whole life story or talk about every interest you share.
A relationship is only going to be meaningful if you make it mean something. And guess what? The conversation isn't about you. So don't just talk about yourself. It's about her and why she is unique. You can only discover that by listening. Don't use the same lines for every girl.
Trust me, girls know when they've been sent a generic message. Listen and respond to what she talks about based on her interests. Ask thoughtful follow-up questions. Write in a way that matches her personality. If she's funny and likes to joke around, tease her back. If she's smart, have an intelligent chat.
Ask an open-ended question that speaks to her personality. Write something unique that will get her attention. "I noticed that you're a civil engineer. If you were building a fortress for a zombie apocalypse, where would you build it and why?" Avoid yes or no questions. Those are real conversation killers.
"I see you're at the beach a lot. This may sound so cliché, but I usually end my Sundays with a sunset walk along the beach, followed by dinner at this really cool pub I recently discovered. It's kind of an end-of-the-week tradition I made. Want to join me someday?" Be witty and clever if brains are your greatest strength.
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This does not mean commenting on her looks. No cat calling has ever worked in history. Girls don't walk down the street and hear "sexy mama!" and magically their interest is piqued. Be genuine and offer compliments that actually mean something. Are there any logos, bands, movies or shows on her clothing or profile that you have in common? If so, this is a good opportunity to compliment her good taste.
"This is may be super corny, but there's just something about your smile that made me want to learn more about you." Compliment on her talents and activities, like if she's crafty or adventurous, or volunteers. "I just spent like an hour reading your blog. You're a really good writer.
Make teasing jokes that are actually compliments after you've learned more about her. "You're awesome! I never imagined someone as cute as you would be into Mortal Kombat!" If it's an obscure interest, you can even throw yourself some back-hand and say that you thought you were the only one.
On the other hand, compliments like "awesome" "fascinating," "it's nice that," and "cool" work the best. Girls have heard every line in the book. They put up with creepy dudes every day. And not to mention all the inappropriate messages and pictures they didn't ask for. You can instantly put yourself above the rest by avoiding common pitfalls.
Don't look narcissistic. Use correct grammar. It goes a long way! Avoid yes or no questions. Remember, the goal of that first message is to start a conversation. You only want to pique her interest enough so that she responds and a conservation will flow. Hopefully this leads to a real-life date.
Once you're past that, simply have a natural and real chat. Let it be organic and friendly, like you are talking to a person you already know. If you have things in common, then the conversation will flow. If it's not a good match, then be appreciative for the chat and move on.
Good luck! Note: This website is made possible through financial relationships with some of the products and services mentioned on this site. We may receive compensation if you shop through links in our content. You do not have to use our links, but you help support Credit, Donkey if you do..
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If you really want to open up the floodgates, discuss any and everything—the more you get to know one another, the better the conversation will be. Questions that require thought are the best things to focus on when it comes to keeping up a conversation. Rather than ask yes or no questions, try bringing up questions that require a bit more thought.
Focusing on asking her questions that have more depth is the best way to get to know one another, and it will certainly keep the conversation going. When you ask questions that require thought and more than a one-word answer, you are opening a world of conversational possibility. When you ask thought-provoking questions, it allows her to ask you the same (or similar), which invites an entire conversation to grow.
In that case, it is okay to focus on yourself a bit. By telling your story, you will encourage your new friend to open up a bit with her story as well. Instead of asking her a million rapid-fire “getting to know you” questions, try discussing a bit about your childhood, or explain why you chose the major you studied in college.
Storytelling is an art—why not practice it? Once you come across those mutual interests, discuss them! Do you and your love interest share a favorite television show? Discuss the theories surrounding your favorite characters, or ask her what she thought about a particularly compelling storyline. If you happen to share a few favorite television shows, ask her for recommendations of what to watch next, or offer her some recommendations of your own.
There are plenty of things to discuss, but if it happens to be your passion, you will likely have an easier time keeping on the subject. Though it can be a tricky subject, discussing world issues is actually a great way to keep up a conversation with someone you are interested in.
If you keep that in mind, discussing world issues is a great way to keep a conversation going. There is never a shortage of issues to discuss and you do not necessarily have to stay controversial. Instead of asking her directly who she supports for public office, try asking her what issues she finds most relevant to our future.
Be confident in who you are and what you are discussing and the rest will feel effortless. Enthusiasm is key when maintaining a conversation. Speaking with a clear, strong voice and a bundle of energy will help you in the long run. Being enthusiastic will make any conversation worth having, even if you are discussing something not necessarily super interesting.